100WC Week#6 – Chloe Old

“ You know what tomorrow is” “it is Friday” ya anything that is special” “oh ya i’m getting a hair cut” “it is my birthday.”“ let’s go to school” “what should i get for her she is going be to 10” “let’s go to school ” i’m going to get you a present OK” “OK bye” “bye.’’ “that is $359.99” “OK thank you” “hi Mum” “ i’m going to see a friend” “OK bye” “bye.” “OK let I need to see what is in that box” “i’m back what were you doing” “but I had to see what was inside the box”.

3 thoughts on “100WC Week#6 – Chloe Old”

  1. Hi Chloe,
    Thank you for entering the challenge this week. I like the way you tried to use dialogue to draw me into your writing. Next time read it back to check it makes sense .
    Keep on writing.
    Mrs MooreTeam 100London

  2. Hi Chloe!
    I must start off by saying that your story was very suspenseful! Good job on creating the mood.
    However, I think you need to add some accompanying words to the dialogue so that it isn’t only people talking. Even if it is only dialogue, the reader needs to know who is speaking so you can add that in your next story. You can ask your teacher for some help with that.

  3. Hi Chloe! This is a very interesting and fun story. My favorite part is the ending. If you do another 100 Word Challenge, I’d love to see it!

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