100WC Week #6 – Mia

I walked around the market…looking for the PERFECT shop to spend my money. And then…I found the PERFECT shop! It was a guess what was in the box…if you guessed it right…you got 50 lollies!!! I walked up to the store and saw how much money it was…$20!!!! That was all my money! But I had to see what was inside! I decided to give the 20 dollars to the man and I put my hand in…and I knew what it was straight away…

“It is a lizard!” I say. The man looked shocked….

4 thoughts on “100WC Week #6 – Mia”

  1. Kia ora Mia.
    Oh my goodness, a lizard! What a surprise indeed, when you put your hand in. I wonder what you might be going to put next to describe the feel of the lizard?
    A small recommendation that I would make to you Mia, is not to overdo the exclamation marks. An exclamation mark is used specifically to exclaim about something. So that means it could be a used for shouting, gasping, moving suddenly, being surprised, and many other times. When you write and need to use an exclamation mark, I think it is good to really consider if it is necessary, and when you do decide to use it, you need just one, not a big long line of them!
    I hope that you might have a look at our class blog and maybe comment on some posts? https://rakau19.edublogs.org/
    Ms M #100WC

  2. Kerry-As a youngster my favorite thing was getting a surprise bag from the store. The excitement of not knowing what was inside. Your character seems to know what is in her box, what a superpower! However, the best thing about your story is we still don’t know whats inside!
    Great job
    McBreezy #team100wc

  3. I have a lizard as a pet in my home. That was nice to give it to the man. Maybe you could put more description of the shop.

  4. I know someone in my class has a lizard. And I really want to know what happens after you guessed it? And maybe you could tell me more about the shop and I think this a really cool story.

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