100WC – Week #30 – Darryl

Booooommm quick the bunker suddenly then i hear gun fire. It was world war 3 everything stopped . We exit the bunker with the military . Said with the mega phone and said every boy is going to join the military. We went to practice, we were ready for war, we raided a town in Sweden and we shot missiles. I dropped to the ground and raided a house. I saw a bunker. I went in, first suddenly the door slammed shut. Suddenly, darkness enveloped the room. Soon we won the war. My dad was old but he was happy I was safe.

2 thoughts on “100WC – Week #30 – Darryl”

  1. Greetings from Australia Darryl. You generated interesting ideas for your writing. Remember that accurate punctuation makes it easy for your readers to read, and understand your writing. I suggest that you ask a friend to help you edit before you publish your text. 🙏😊

    1. Heya Darryl, an action-packed story this week! I loved how you opened your story with a big BOOM – this is called onomatopoeia (you should ask your teacher for more examples of this really interesting technique!). I like how you have tried to do a lot in your story, because it shoes you are trying really hard and that you want to improve. You could look at how other writers use speech marks, and maybe this will give you a hand for your next story. Have a great week, and thanks for letting me read your story!

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